Moving To Vegas: Expectation vs. Reality


A guest author shares his year of living in Sin City…the great and not-so-great…

Tommy Gun came to the United States to perform in the Aussie Heat male revue. Having lived the Sin City life before returning to his native Australia, he now reflects on his experiences and if they met his preconceived notions of Las Vegas.

Moving to Vegas Reality vs. Expectations

                       Tommy (far left) with the cast of Aussie Heat…

We all have expectations. Let’s be honest. We all carry preconceived ideas about new experiences and sometimes they turn out fantastic. Sometimes it just really sucks. G’day everyone, my name is Tommy. I’m from sunny Australia and I lived and worked in Las Vegas for one year. I did as much as I could and experienced everything with an open mind.

“A little bit of everything” I said to myself, because after all it is Vegas, and you have to go ALL IN. When my working VISA was finalized for the USA, I couldn’t have been more excited. My initial thoughts of Las Vegas were fast food everywhere, casinos, flashing lights, millionaires on every corner, HOT weather and nothing to do but drink and gamble.

Boy, was I in for a surprise! Luckily for me, I worked as a dancer for the Aussie Heat show (then known as Aussie Hunks) inside Planet Hollywood Casino. I was blessed with the opportunity to meet many incredible people and experience the ‘real’ Las Vegas.

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       The luxury apartment complex I shared with other members of the cast…

The Food – 

Expectations:

My first thought was I would find it hard to eat healthy. I was concerned there would be junk food everywhere I looked, and eating out would mainly consist of burgers, chips, burritos and everything that is delicious yet naughty. I didn’t think I would find much cultural variety of food to be honest.

Reality:

Wow! What can I say? I’ve never been so wrong. Vegas had a little bit of something for everybody. If you dig deep enough and talk to the right people, you can find food gems!
I was able to eat healthy and also indulge in the naughty foods too.

I’m a “cheap and cheerful” kind of guy. I like good deals, delicious food and generous servings. Nothing too fancy, just a ‘good feed’ is what I love. So for me it was the 24/7 diners that really take the cake. I’m going to mention two of my personal favorites.

Ellis Island – Village Pub Casino Cafe
Just a five-minute walk off the strip, you will find a small casino that frequents the locals. It’s charming yet excessively noisy. The cafe has some of the best food deals you can get. I ordered the ‘NY steak and eggs’ special at least 4 times a week. It only cost $5.99 at the time (11 pm-11 am) and is an ‘off the menu’ deal that only locals know about. Thank me later!

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                          Ellis Island NY Steak and Eggs special is only $5.99

Silver Sevens Casino – Sterling Spoon Cafe
It’s not the most popular casino, but the cafe sure gives you a great deal on the prime rib. Service was okay. Atmosphere? Not that amazing. Do I care? Absolutely not! Like I said, guys, I just enjoy good, satisfying grub, and you can’t go past Silver Sevens with a happy appetite. Try the prime rib meal for only $9.99. It’s great value with good portions. Not the best rib you will ever eat, nor will it be the worst. It’s just a great bargain.

I’ll quickly mention a few other absolute winners you can find:

Holstein’s Shakes and Buns – for the best thick shake in Vegas (and I’ve tried many). Creamy, cold and smooth silky texture just melts in your mouth.

Samba Latte – If you’re a coffee lover like myself and enjoy a good latte, then there is no competition to this world famous cafe located just outside the Monte Carlo Casino. Expensive but worth it. (Editor’s note – Samba Latte is currently closed due to ongoing renovations at Monte Carlo/Park MGM)

Moving to Vegas Reality vs. Expectations

The stylish interior of ‘Samba Latte’ adds to the hipster vibe of this successful cafe.

Quality of Life

Expectations:

The Millionaires’ Playground is what Vegas is portrayed to be in films. Flashing lights, glamorous girls, limousines, pool parties and lavish lifestyles. I expected to see a well-structured city with a stable economy and plenty of employment for everyone. Since it’s the world’s playground with millions of dollars flowing in and out every year, I thought the everyday locals would have a relatively comfortable income.

Reality:

I was shocked to see how the majority of Las Vegas people were living. Let me share with you a few stories of my experiences. Before our show moved to Planet Hollywood, we were based in the D Hotel Casino on Downtown’s Fremont St. On this particular day, we all had a few hours of free time before the show started so we decided to go work out at the gym.

Upon arrival we discovered the gym was closed for some unknown reason. A bunch of Aussie blokes being our optimistic selves, made the decision to venture by foot into North Las Vegas suburbs to find a playground in which we could do pull ups, calisthenics, etc.

Moving to Vegas Reality vs. Expectations

Walking through the suburbia streets, I have never felt so unsafe. We must have stuck out like sore thumbs because we got stares everywhere we went. The neighborhood looked like a scene from Boyz n the Hood. Broken windows boarded up, cracked roofs, rubbish in the front yard, old beaten-down cars, neglected lawns and doors barely hanging on by the hinges.

We found a park and exercised for about 30 minutes before a bunch of ‘gang-banging’-looking kids appeared from the shadows near the basketball court. It looked as though we might have intruded on their ‘turf’. It was at that point we all decided it was a good time to leave, and I’m glad we did because it certainly wasn’t a place we felt welcome.

The day we went for a photo shoot at a studio located near the Stratosphere Casino, I was stupid enough not to pack lunch with me. So during our lunch break I was forced to walk to the casino for a meal. I couldn’t believe my eyes. The houses around and just off the famous Las Vegas Strip were absolute dumps!

Not only was suburbia a shocking sight for us to see, but the poverty extends right next to the tourist hub. Every now and then I would walk past a house that was literally falling apart, yet the car in the driveway would be a brand new Ford F-350 (or something similar) with shiny new rims and tinted windows. If that isn’t a clear signal that a drug dealer lives there, then I don’t know what is.

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This apartment complex located right behind the LINQ Casino was on my walk to work every day. We all called it the “Kitchen Tiles Complex” because of the terrible exterior design.

Things To Do – 

Expectations:

To be honest, I didn’t think there would be much to do In Las Vegas besides drink, gamble and watch the odd Cirque show. My expectations didn’t really extend past there. I set the bar low, and I was genuinely worried I would be bored quickly because I’m not a drinker nor a gambler.

Reality:

I can happily say that I was never once bored during my whole year working in Las Vegas. That’s not an exaggeration…I literally always had things to do. Maybe It was in part due to me being in a show and surrounded by people in the entertainment
industry.

I personally think Vegas has a plethora of activities and entertaining things to do regardless. In my one year as a resident, Vegas surprised and invigorated me enough that I still miss the city to this day. We all know casinos have all kinds of entertainment, ranging from theater shows and shopping to themed bars. But there is a lot to be said about other parts of Vegas besides the obvious.

Brooklyn Bowl –

As a group of dancers, one of our favorite pastimes would be seeing live music at the Brooklyn Bowl. This modern venue which hosts live music, bowling, beer and food is the ultimate night out for those who want a little bit of everything. What I enjoyed most about this venue is the variety of music they had. On a Wednesday you might
see a soul band, Thursday a punk rock band, then on Friday a hip-hop artist. I found myself checking their website every week to see who was playing.

Moving to Vegas Reality vs. Expectations

Lake Mead –

Sometime it’s nice to get out of the city for a little bit, and with the beautiful crystal clear Lake Mead only a thirty-minute drive from Las Vegas you can’t go wrong. Wake-boarding was my activity of choice, and when the average summer temperature can reach
104 F, there nothing better than the feeling of fresh cool water on your skin.

Sometimes the pool parties just won’t cut it, especially when you’re not in the mood to deal with drunk obnoxious people and overpriced drinks. There are also a host of other water activities to choose from and the scenic backdrop of the desert mountains just tops off the real American-style landscape you expect to see as a foreigner.

Moving to Vegas Reality vs. Expectations

A picture I took at Drai’s Beach Club, and a still from a video of my fiancé wake boarding at Lake Mead. Which do you prefer? Personally, I will take Lake Mead any day

ATV Tours –

As you can see, I’m a lover of extreme activities and outdoors adventures. So it’s no surprise I’m also advocating these super-fun ATV tours in the Las Vegas desert. Seriously, what better way to see the incredible Nevada landscape AND experience an adrenaline-rushing activity?

The more I Googled “things to do in Vegas” the more I found! I couldn’t have been happier with the variety of entertainment options for all kinds of people. So much for “only drinking and gambling”. It turns out Las Vegas has so much more to offer. If all you do is sit at slot machines when you’re in town, then you’re doing it wrong! You need to start living life!

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                    My fiancé and I on an ATV tour in the Vegas Desert.

The Grand Canyon –

I feel compelled to finish off my outdoor activity rant by advocating the incredible and vast Grand Canyon in Arizona. Yes, it’s nowhere near Las Vegas, and it’s not even in Nevada, but it’s something you HAVE to see! Words can’t describe how amazing this mile-deep geological wonder is.

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If you decide to go, see it either when the sun rises or the sun sets. It’s simply a magical experience when the light captures all the crevasses and ridges of the canyon as the sun moves across the horizon.

The drive to the Skywalk is only roughly two hours. The entrance to the National Park where you can test yourself with a day trek is only a four-hour drive. If you don’t like to drive, there are many helicopter companies that offer tours over the Canyon at affordable prices.

Moving to Vegas Reality vs. Expectations

                      Taking in the beauty of Grand Canyon national park.

The People

Expectations:

Having not known much about Las Vegas, I expected to see mostly white people…overweight and very loud. Why? Because in my experiences with Americans in Australia, that’s usually what I saw. It was more of a subconscious expectation and not something that I premeditated.

Reality:

Much can be said about people anywhere in the world. There is good and bad everywhere you look. I would like to talk about one aspect of the Las Vegas people that genuinely surprised me. The variety was astonishing.

There were people from all walks of life. I discovered that Las Vegas not only had white people, but also a huge Latino population, African Americans, Asians, Europeans and even Islanders. I may seem naive to you, but I did not expect this magnitude of cultural variety. Las Vegas seems to to bring people from all over the world, and I think if you live here long enough you are blessed to see, meet and talk to many people with all different views on life.

Moving to Vegas Reality vs. Expectations

Being part of the Aussie Heat show’s cast, I had to opportunity to mingle with the audience after the show and get photos etc. The thing I enjoyed most about this was meeting the people from all over America. I was learning about people from North Carolina to Oregon. From all different backgrounds, religions and cultures, I learned that America is such a diverse place.

I believe many people in Australia fall into the trap of generalizing the people in California as ‘all of America’ because that’s usually all we see from Hollywood films. The truth is, the people from Texas to New York couldn’t be any more different!

Casinos

Expectations:

Having seen films such as The Hangover, Ocean’s Eleven and What Happens in Vegas, once again I had the Hollywood perspective of casinos. I expected lavish lights, cocktail waitresses, fancy interiors and the lure of the ‘High Roller’ lifestyle.

Reality:

I have mixed emotions here. There are some things I love, and some things I hate about the main attraction to Las Vegas tourists. Yes, the films were pretty, accurate in my opinion. The casinos really are an adult’s playground with a little bit of something for everyone, but there are definite drawbacks.

I simply couldn’t get enough of the Cirque du Soleil shows. Simply amazing…jaw dropping. I clapped until my hands hurt. If I had enough expendable income I would have seen every Cirque show, but alas I could only see two – Zumanity and . Tickets are expensive, but when you witness the amazing performances and life-threatening stunts, you understand why.

Moving to Vegas Reality vs. Expectations

              Backstage with the cast of KÂ. I’m at the back, trust me!

Most casinos boast successful shows, millions in revenue from gambling and shopping, amazing decor and nightclubs packed to the brim. You would think these places make a killing, and they do! However with all the millions of dollars in revenue, there are certain casinos that charge for parking! Say what?

At this point do you really need to suck every single cent out of your loyal (sometimes gambling-addicted) customers? I think it’s sad. And I would think if parking was free (like it is in most places), your customers would appreciate it and return more often (resulting in better profit over the long term).

With that aside, I LOVE the attention to detail in the aesthetics of both the interior and exterior of the buildings, with special mention to Venetian, Caesars Palace, Bellagio and New York NY. They represent the intended themes perfectly. Having personally traveled to Venice, Rome, Lake Bellagio in Italy and New York City, I can safely say that the decor did each location justice. I didn’t feel as though they were a cheap rip-off, but more of a homage to the intended locations.

 

Moving to Vegas Reality vs. Expectations

                             The fabulous New York NY casino exterior… 

However, once inside, my spirit became a little dampened by the people occupying it. I feel as though Las Vegas, while fun for adults, should not be a place to bring your children on holiday if you are gambling. Let’s be honest here, most parents coming here are spending lots of time on the casino floor.

Imagine taking your beloved dog to the beach, but instead of letting him swim and run around playfully in the waves, you keep him on a leash and sit on the walkway chair texting on your phone. Bringing your kids to Vegas is just as bad.

Moving to Vegas Reality vs. Expectations

     The ‘Pitbull’ concert I attended at Planet Hollywood – he did an amazing job!

I’m glad I chose to work for one year in Las Vegas, It’s been one of the best choices I have ever made. All in all, Vegas really surprised me and taught me lessons I would never have learned otherwise.

If you haven’t been to Las Vegas yet, you simply must go at least once. It’s a city full of surprises.

Tommy Gun has returned to his native Australia and now operates his own entertainment company – Gold Coast Male Strippers. You can visit his website for more information, pictures and videos. 

Photos: Tommy Gun

 

 

“Aussie Heat” Host Creates a Natural Approach to Fitness Products


Adam Barr’s muscular cast endorses his Green Barr cannabis-based wellness formulas…

Having covered the Mr. Olympia Fitness Expo for many years in Las Vegas, I’ve seen many outside-the-box health and fitness products. Ones like ManCakes high-protein pancakes. Arctic Zero fit frozen desserts. Ostrim ostrich-based jerky and meat sticks. Now Aussie Heat host Adam Barr has opened up a whole new world of ideas with a cannabis-based line of health and wellness products named Green Barr.

The uses of marijuana go back thousands of years, from ancient anesthesia in China to treatment of cataracts in Egypt. Until just recently, marketing items from this family of plants in contemporary United States would have been illegal…and perceived by many as outlandish. But times are changing and the laws are catching up.

Aussie Heat Adam Green Barr

There are those who view cannabis as a type of miracle cure. It’s been used for treatment from conditions as diverse as epilepsy in children to dementia in Alzheimer’s patients. It’s also known to ease the side effects of cancer treatments and has been proven to attack cancer cells.

As the medical community reverses its position on marijuana/cannabis from being a recreational drug to one of serious medical importance, the general public is taking note. And while everyone is playing catch-up with the legalities, forward-thinking individuals are preparing to usher in a new wave of uses.

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     Adam Barr (center, back row) and the guys have a flex-off with this writer…

Adam Barr is one such individual. You may recognize Barr from my numerous articles on the innovative upstart Aussie Heat male revue Planet Hollywood’s V Theater. Adam is a stand-up kind of guy…literally. When not using his charisma to host the sexy production, he sometimes takes to the stage for his own comedy routines.

Aussie Heat Adam Green Barr

Adam Barr is an advocate of all things natural…                  

But Adam’s venture into the cannabis business is no joke. This lover of nature in all its forms has looked to ancient healing methods to create the Green Barr line. His products use natural medicines to restore healthy living and promote recovery. With them, he intends to take the fitness community by storm.

Aussie Heat Adam Green Barr

In a phone interview last week, Adam explained the varieties of marijuana and why various classes are regulated differently.  He said that most people associate marijuana with THC (tetrahydrocannabinol), the mind-altering form that creates a euphoric “high”…and a stimulated appetite. THC is currently listed as a Schedule 1 drug by the U.S. Drug Enforcement Agency and is regulated as such (a detailed explanation is here).

But then there is CBD (cannabidiol), a non-psychoactive compound that’s mostly derived from hemp. While CBD won’t affect the mind, its positive effects on the body make for an impressive check-list of treatments for common ailments.

The most promising research these days is for the use of CBD to fight cancer. Cannabidiol has been shown to block the spread of cancer cells, slow their growth and encourage the destruction of cancerous cells altogether.

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The use of CBD and cannabis derivatives for everyday problems is what Green Barr is all about. By that I mean stress, anxiety, pain, acne, inflammation and depression. Then there are anti-emetic (nausea and vomiting) and anti-oxidant (neuro-regenerative) benefits as well.

Barr had the idea to create a line of micro-dose CBD (Emerald) and cannabis (Green) products that would target athletes, fitness enthusiasts and those looking for a natural alternatives for healing.

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Aussie Heat Adam Green Barr

         Stuntman Simon Farrow’s heroic frame is built on Green Mag Mist…   

Adam then teamed up with Simon Farrow, his muscular cast mate from Aussie Heat. Farrow is a sometime movie stuntman (Alien: Covenant) and actor who already had his own Organics4me line of magnesium-centric pre-workout spray. Together they’ve expanded and refined Green Barr‘s presentation to include teas, capsules, tablets, moisturizing creams and spray mist.

Aussie Heat Adam Green Barr

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Aussie Heat Adam Green Barr

While laws continue to change regarding the distribution of CBD and cannabis, Barr is taking a grassroots (pardon the pun) approach to marketing. In order to do that, Adam is starting small…like selling at farmers’ markets in Los Angeles.

Behind that will be conventional retailing through gyms and online. Of course, the goal of any marketing plan is mass distribution. In this case, easy-to-access state-regulated dispensaries are where Adam ultimately wants Green Barr to be sold.

Not having tried marijuana products of any kind in the past, I was hesitant to sample a relaxation formula that Barr gave me. But years of insomnia have haunted me and it is difficult to get through an entire night.

So I tried one micro-dose capsule before bedtime and slept like I hadn’t in years….with zero negative effects the next day. In fact, I woke up feeling refreshed and alert and got that result every time. As you might imagine, it was thrilling.

The cast of Aussie Heat also uses and swears by Green Barr. With those hard-working bodies on display at the intimate V Theater each night, there’s no way to hide the results of their successful regimens.

Aussie Heat Adam Green Barr

Simon Ata puts “flex” in “flexible” thanks in part to Green Barr supplements…

Simon Ata aka “Simonster” is one of Green Barr‘s biggest advocates. As a member of StrengthProject.com‘s fitness team, this shredded young athlete performs astounding gymnastics, yet his body is always flexible and healthy-looking.

Aussie Heat Adam Green Barr

Performing a physically-demanding show nightly can be taxing on bodies of any age. For the Aussie Heat guys, a typical day requires rehearsal and stretching before hitting the stage at 10:30pm. Then they move over to nearby Blondie’s to greet and hang out with audience members before having dinner after 2 am. Then some of them hit the all-night gym for strength conditioning. If Green Barr products can help performers like these guys to get through a typical work week, imagine what they can do for someone in the conventional 9-to-5 world.

To learn more about the beneficial effects of micro-dose cannabis and CBD, check out Green Barr‘s Instagram page or visit them on Facebook.

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Me (center) flexing with the guys from Aussie Heat…                 

Note: This is not a compensated endorsement. Green Barr works for me.

Aussie Heat performs Thursday through Sunday at 10:30 pm inside Planet Hollywood’s V Theater. VegasFool.com is offering a ten-dollar discount by following this link and using promo code VEGASFOOL10 at checkout.

Photos: Sammasseur, Green Barr, Simon Ata, Adam Barr, Simon Farrow

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Male Revues from a Gay P.O.V. – Part 2


More info on where to go and what to expect from a gay guy’s perspective…

A few weeks back I explored the various resident male revues, ranking them in terms of their inclusion of audience members who are guys. It was, I think, a pretty thorough guidebook, but not entirely complete. At the end, I promised to contact two long-running stripper clubs that included male revues in their entertainment roster.

Male revues gay

Since publishing that original piece, I have reached out several times to the powers that be at Kings of Hustler and Men of Sapphire. Both expressed interest in participating in this article, yet neither provided responses to a series of questions I sent their way. Numerous follow-up attempts yielded nada, so I’m just going to let that go.

Male revues gay

I can say, however, that both locations permit attendance by men. Your level of interactivity will vary depending on the individual performers…and perhaps the degree of business they have that night (everyone has bills to pay and lap dances aren’t free). Also, since I was a guest at both places, I’m unable to provide admission prices.

Male revues gay

Another unresolved matter was my review of the upstart Black Magic Live. Unseen by me when Part 1 of this series was published, I wish that had remained the case. Black Magic Live is an absolute mess and I cannot recommend it at all. While not a mega-flop on the level of Magic Mike Live, it is indeed a cheap, chaotic disaster unworthy of your time and money.

Male revues gay

Because nothing says “Sexy Night in Vegas” like a wedding hall…                

Black Magic Live began its run at the Tommy Wind Theater, otherwise known as the place where shows go to die. It quickly moved to Ron Decar Events Center, a banquet hall belonging to Viva Las Vegas wedding chapel.

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Male revues gay

You may find yourself wanting to look away, too…                             

BML is now on its third venue for calendar year 2017. As of this month, the show is performing inside the little known Embassy Night Club in a skeevy industrial area past the west side of the Strip. The Latino spot was in the news this past April when three patrons were stabbed in the parking lot. Stay away!

I’ve also revisited both Chippendales and Aussie Heat at V Theater since the last article. The boys at Chipps continue to be the glossiest cast in town, but not much has changed aside from the completion of Tyson Beckford‘s hosting stint (…or is he back? The website still lists him). That’s not necessarily a bad thing, as Chippendales set the bar for all male revues.

Male revues gay

Aussie Heat, on the other hand, seems to have ramped up their willingness to entertain guests of both (all?) genders. Along with an infectious silliness and sense of fun, the lesser-known troupe from Oz (not to be confused with the always-coasting Thunder From Down Under) continues to bend over backward for each and every audience member.

And like the stripper clubs, they offer a free party bus to get you there and some of the lowest ticket prices in town. Groupon is currently offering $49 general admission seats for Aussie Heat with no additional fees. Compare that to Magic Mike Live, where the farthest seats of the upper balcony will still run you over $120.00.

Male revues gay

You may remember that I chose Aussie Heat as my #1 male revue for inclusion of all audience members. As you can see, the response is overwhelmingly positive:

Male revues gay

Male revues gay

Check out this clip below for a taste of Aussie Heat, recorded Saturday 10/28/17. Be aware that it is probably NSFW.

So there you have it, my most complete guide to male revue residencies for guys. Whichever one you choose, be sure to cut loose and have some fun.

After all, Sin City can’t do any sinning without you.

Photos: Sammasseur, Black Magic Live, Aussie Heat, Men of Sapphire, Kings of Hustler

Magic Mike Live Is D.O.A.


Poorly-conceived circus collapses under the weight of its own contradictions…

Imagine a bunch of “bros” arriving in Vegas, intent on having a rowdy time. They prop up their feet at Larry Flynt’s Hustler Club, booze and money in hand, eager to be titillated. But instead of bare breasts and g-strings, the party boys get some low-rent male comedian babbling about his problems…and the ladies stay clothed.

You can believe there would be booing, flying fists and sailing beer bottles within a few minutes if this happened to guys. And yet, that same bait-and-switch is exactly what you’re served at Magic Mike Live…with the genders reversed. It’s a whole lot of  pro-female “humor” and blah-blah-blah masquerading as a male revue.

Magic Mike Live

Magic Mike Live

Despite being named after actor Channing Tatum’s pair of male-stripper films, this live show has essentially ZERO to do with them. It starts off promisingly enough, with local favorite Mark Shunock (Rock of Ages) gliding into the audience with a flashy jacket and flashier grin, then quickly plummets down the stairs.

One would assume that Shunock is channeling the first film’s “Dallas” (loosely based on real-life Vegas resident London Steele of Kings of Hustler). That calculating club owner, as portrayed by Matthew McConaughey, would make the perfect campy host for a rowdy night out. Alas, after a few raunchy jokes about desert-dried vaginas and such, Shunock disappears entirely (a cardboard standee of him is brought out during final bows…I’m not kidding).

Magic Mike Live

Next, a quartet enters the performance space, clad as your typical fantasy-hero types: cowboy, fireman, police officer, etc. A woman is coaxed onstage from the audience. It turns out that she is a plant…and subsequently the REAL emcee of the show. This abrasively-voiced harpy chides these characters for being misogynistic and cliched. But isn’t that what the movies were about?

What attracted audiences to the films were Channing and his hot Hollywood pals gyrating around in various states of undress, not the plot line. Complaints of “too much story” were even addressed in the sequel, wherein dance numbers and skin quotient were amped up.

Tatum and his production company, Iron Horse Entertainment, decided…after reading message boards…fans were demanding “more dancing and less story”. “Look, at the end of the day, it’s a stripper movie,” he says. Hence the extended dance sequences, with catchy tunes and screaming women in the background. The Straits Times, 7/8/15

Magic Mike Live

               The cast of Magic Mike Live begs you to buy into their nonsense…

But back to the show….the foursome of “Village People rejects” are forced offstage by the actual dancers of MML. You’re told in no uncertain terms that these are the kind of guys that women TRULY fantasize about. Spotlights scan the crowd, searching for “a doctor, a musician, the nice guy with a job, someone who will rub your feet without being asked”…you know, the type of men that sex-crazed women flew all the way to Vegas to drool over.

The hostess then promises multi-cultural offerings in what’s to follow and proves so by lining up four men in deepening shades of brown.  She squawks “I’ve always wanted to have a mixed (bi-racial) baby!” in an irritating cackle. Imagine how offensive this scene would be if viewed in the context of a stage production of ROOTS. It’s as ugly and off-putting as it sounds.

Magic Mike Live

Tatum has promised in interviews that Magic Mike Live would not reflect the movies (but has no issue with using the bankable name). Instead, his goal was for this project to focus on “female empowerment.” According to this show, what women want is just someone to impregnate them and pay their bills. It seems to me that women relying on men to get through life is the antithesis of female empowerment, wouldn’t you say?

So if you’re heading to Magic Mike Live to get your guy-porn on, you’ve just learned in no uncertain terms that you are SOL. Fortunately, there are genuine, infinitely superior and far less expensive male revues in Las Vegas for ladies (and gay guys) to spend their entertainment dollars on.

The messages conveyed in MML are so conflicting that they’re delusional. The fun-sucking emcee, portrayed by little-known Chicago comedienne Lyndsay Nicole Hailey (with Vegas local Chelsea Phillips-Reid subbing on Wednesdays), turns what might have been a guilty pleasure into a treatise on man-bashing. Expect divorce rates to soar among ticket-buyers.

At this point, you might be wondering how anything from the Magic Mike films connects to this fiasco. That answer comes in two parts. First, Lyndsay prays to a “mystical unicorn” who rewards her with a bejeweled microphone lowered from the ceiling (a magic mic….seriously?). She uses said mic to lure a handsome waiter onstage to try his hand at a striptease. It turns out that he’s also a plant…an employee supposedly named “Mike”. Oh, brother.

In the film, Mike is a construction worker who persuades a new guy on the crew to moonlight with him at a dance club. In a lame effort to distance the show from the movie, Mike is now the newbie instead.  He claims that he can’t dance, so Lyndsay exposes him to a series of sequences designed to fire up his libido and get those hips gyrating.

Magic Mike Live

What follows is a watered-down variation on Absinthe. Sets, props, and characters descend from the ceiling and rise from the floor. Singers, acrobats, aerialist and musicians appear, awkwardly draping audience members across a grand piano and the lap of a drummer.

Songs take center stage with relatively little in the way of actual strip-tease. The dancers are fully clothed for much of the proceedings. When they aren’t, you might find yourself wishing they were.

Magic Mike Live

It’s a bumpy ride both onstage and off at Magic Mike Live….      

The emcee struts onstage after each sequence, loudly declaring “how hot that was!”. At one point, that swagger becomes a stagger…her blouse and jacket are torn apart and her hair has fallen loose. “I feel like my vagina was just beaten up!” she exclaims. Is this entertainment or a PSA for battered women? Whatever it is, it’s in poor taste…and not funny in the slightest.

Magic Mike Live

Exactly 54 minutes pass before the first guy ditches his pants. Even then, his church-friendly briefs stay in place. How do I know the length of time so precisely? Because I couldn’t stop staring at my watch, eager for this mess to end.

Before the show limps its painful but welcome finale, Lyndsay can’t resist one final reminder of the inadequacies of men. She urges the ladies in the audience to get to their feet and hold one another. “When’s the last time you slow-danced with someone?”, she asks. Thanks, MML, for that feminist group-therapy session. Can we have some fun now?

If you’ve noticed that I haven’t reviewed the dancers, that’s because they play such an inconsequential part of the production as a whole. None of them are particularly memorable. Not even “Mike”, whose transformation into the titular character is actually quite dull.

Magic Mike Live

Magic Mike Live

The saving grace of the production is the venue itself. LOTS of Tatum-infused cash has been laid out to transform Hard Rock‘s Body English nightclub into an absolutely glorious theater. The corridor leading into it is tastefully appointed (aside from dozens of oddly-empty picture frames). A narrow stairway leads you down to the basement theater, a multi-level beauty.

Magic Mike Live

One oddity worth mentioning is the lack of a gift shop. Where are the t-shirts, calendars, posters and memorabilia? These things are standard at most Vegas shows. With more than a year of preparation since MML was announced, surely a line of souvenirs could have been produced and marketed. Very strange…as if Hard Rock had little faith in an extended run.

Update – since the original publishing of this review, an online store has been established. I’m uncertain if products are available at the showroom, as I’ve not been (and have no intention of going) back.

Magic Mike Live No

                                       This audience member’s sign says it all…

Once seated, a massive team of attractive ushers, bartenders and wait staff will make you feel welcome and pampered. A Hard Rock insider told me two months ago that all waiters and bartenders would be shirtless throughout their shifts (sadly, that’s not the case). But even without a show, I’d still stop there just to let them serve me a cocktail…or three.

Magic Mike Live

The true standouts here are indeed the wait staff…a collection of charming, attentive and handsome lads that exude more charisma and sex appeal than anything you’ll see onstage. Imagine, if you will…the first fake-out (Village People vs. Modern Man) gives way to a SECOND fake-out, wherein the studly waiters who’ve been giving you excellent service suddenly set down their trays and take to the stage. Now THAT would have been different…and far superior to anything that MML currently offers.

Magic Mike Live

Superstar Channing Tatum tossed oodles of money onto a vacuous stage….

As it is now, Magic Mike Live is a misandristic mess…an expensive and overblown bomb that’s about as sexy as Menopause – The Musical. It ranks alongside the first phase of Criss Angel BeLIEve as one of the most poorly-conceived Vegas productions of the past decade.

This is one major show desperately in need of a gutting and overhaul. Tomorrow wouldn’t be soon enough.

MAGIC MIKE LIVE performs Wednesday through Sunday at 8 pm and 10:30 pm. Tickets start at $75 (plus taxes/fees) and can be ordered here

Photos: Sammasseur

This article was previously posted elsewhere in another form.

Ranking Male Revues from a Gay P.O.V.


In this era of inclusion, how welcome are men at various male stripper shows?

Back in 1985, John Travolta played a Rolling Stone reporter in the semi-fictional drama Perfect. Assigned to cover the singles scene in Los Angeles, Travolta finds himself attending a male revue (save the jokes for later). Interestingly, he is forced to watch the proceedings from behind a screen. According to Laraine Newman’s character, men are forbidden from attending the show (a thinly-disguised Chippendales).

Male revues

Male revues

That was 35 years ago. These days, you’re as likely to see men in the audience as on the stage. I can say that from experience, as these shows are one of my favorite things to do when in Sin City. And they’re an absolute balls-to-the-wall blast!

While I attend as an openly gay man, not every guy in the audience is homosexual. It’s worth pointing out that women of all persuasions have been attending topless revues for decades, and that has always been acceptable.

As we gravitate towards an era of full inclusion, the lines of sexuality have blurred. But that doesn’t mean that men will get the same level of welcome and interactivity at each and every show. Many readers have asked me to recommend guy-friendly male revues, based on my personal experiences. Please note that this article in no way reflects the sexuality of the performers appearing in their respective shows.

So here they are, rated on a scale of one to five, with five being the highest.

MAGIC MIKE LIVE – 1 out of 5

Male revues

The stand-and-model troupe at Magic Mike Live disappoints on all counts…                

A stillborn offspring of Channing Tatum’s film franchise, Magic Mike Live really isn’t recommended for anyone. It’s a difficult slog to sit through and already my choice for the worst new show of 2017. The guys remain clothed for much of the running time, which is somewhat of a blessing in disguise (see below). Worse yet, a screeching female host makes the production nearly unbearable by squawking post-menopausal life lessons throughout.

Male revues

 It’s a bumpy road to Magic Mike Live. Don’t take it…         

Public relations insiders have told me that the team at Magic Mike Live has shown little interest in marketing to the lucrative gay demographic. There’s very little reason for me to doubt that, especially after on my own experience.

Men hoping to get a lap dance or a round of onstage excitement will leave feeling disappointed…and out of lots of cash. Drinks and tickets are quite expensive. On the upside, cocktail servers are attentive (not to mention especially attractive) and save the evening from being a total loss.

THUNDER FROM DOWN UNDER – 2 out of 5

Male revues

Thunder From Down Under doesn’t rank high on the list for guys…             

The long-running Aussie revue Thunder from Down Under at Excalibur allows men to attend (as do they all), but don’t expect to get more than a fist-bump from the dancers as they work their way through the audience. The rough-and-tumble men of the Outback are dripping with testosterone, but only seem interested in sharing it with the ladies.

Straight men will find the atmosphere completely “non-threatening”. Don’t expect to see guys brought up onstage for any audience participation segments, either. But they CAN purchase a group shot after the show.

Said one former member of the troupe “Guys don’t go to ‘hen shows’ where we come from. We just aren’t used to that.”

Chippendales – 4.5 out of 5

Guys8

Chippendales is shy of getting a perfect score, but an absolute favorite…            

The grand master of all male revues, Chippendales still packs them in and keeps up with the times. There is a moderate amount of interactivity with guys during audience numbers and plenty of shout-outs to gay members celebrating birthdays and such. I’ve even seen a guy celebrating his 21st brought onstage for a free calendar.

Straight guys should find this one well within their comfort zone. It’s kind of like hanging out with the bros…and single straight men should have a good time in the Flirt Lounge before and after the performance, chatting it up with the female attendees.

What keeps Chippendales from achieving a perfect five-star rating is that, after attending dozens of times, I’ve yet to see a man brought onstage for any regular segments. If you’ve witnessed otherwise, be sure to hit me up in the comments.

I’m giving Chipps an extra half star since the production is a huge public supporter of gay fans. They’ve even featured an openly-gay host or two. Gentlemen are welcome to purchase group photos with the cast, and you can chat with the guys one-on-one after the final performance of each evening.

Aussie Heat – 5 out of 5

Male revues

This upstart group takes on the big boys…and wins top honors. Not to be confused with Thunder from Down Under, the Aussie Heat show is a no-holds-barred fest of boy-flesh for men and women equally. Held in the intimate second-level V Theater 2 at Planet Hollywood’s Miracle Mile Shops, Aussie Heat fills the space with abs, biceps, butts and pecs. No audience member is ignored, and that’s the case from beginning to end.

Men are regularly selected for an onstage lap dance contest where three participants are blindfolded. They’re then asked to identify a particular dancer based on other senses…including taste and touch!

The Aussie boys spend plenty of time in the audience, often draping themselves across laps and inviting you to lick, fondle, rub and squeeze. Every dancer is an equal-opportunity flirt, besides being classically-trained performers in their own right. So this one is only recommended for open-minded straight men with a sense of adventure…and fun.

I’ve written two previous articles regarding the willingness of Aussie Heat to entertain male audiences. They’ve even gone so far as to have their nightly after-party once a week in a short-lived gay venue nearby.

Pre-show VIP experiences allow you to meet and photograph the guys in the prep room while they stretch and pump up their muscles. Photos with the cast are available for purchase after the show (proceeds go to Opportunity Village, a local charity), which can be as naughty as you want.

Men Of The Strip – 5 out of 5

Male revues

I debated whether to include Men of the Strip in these rankings, as the production is currently on hiatus. What started as a planned residency ended up as a 6-night stint in Vegas with a possible tour on the way. But since there’s a chance of it returning with a regular schedule, I’m listing MOTS here with the others.

Male revues

And Men of the Strip is certainly worthy of a gay male audience. Emcees address both genders in the audience with equal enthusiasm while lap dances and interaction are guy-friendly (cash tipping is allowed). Straight guys might be squirming in their chairs, but won’t mind hanging out with the worked-up ladies at the bar afterward.

MOTS ranks right up there with Aussie Heat in bringing guys onto the stage and into the action. If you want to see what I mean, check out the clip above from a performance at Hard Rock Cafe. Be aware that it’s not safe for work.

Black Magic Live aka Vivica’s Black Magic – Rating to be determined

mots14

This one is a toughie, compounded by the fact that I haven’t actually seen it…or spoken to anyone who has. This all-black male revue, currently playing at Ron Decar Events Center after a stint at Tommy Wind Theater, gained notoriety when actress Vivica A. Fox angered members of the LGBTQ community in a radio interview suggesting that gays weren’t welcome to attend. She later apologized.

Fox and the show’s executive producer Jean-Claude LaMarre have entered a legal battle over the issue:

“As a result of Fox’s defamatory social media campaign, LaMarre’s customers canceled ‘Black Magic Live’ tickets and demanded refunds at shows” the suit states. VARIETY 6/5/17

It remains unclear at this point whether Fox is still affiliated with the production, as the official website refers to the show with two titles, one conspicuously removing Vivica’s name. A very well-known member of the media, who was previously in a Vegas male revue, wrote to me directly with this information:

The owners are actually very gay friendly. I know some of the cast too. Sweet guys. All very gay friendly as well. I’d hate to see them get shot down before ever given a chance.

If you’ve seen Black Magic, please leave your impressions in the comments or drop me a line directly.

Next up, I’ll visit Kings of Hustler and Men of Sapphire, two male-centric offshoots of popular female stripper clubs. I’ll examine their guy-guest policies and what to expect when attending.

Photos by Sammasseur, VivicasBlackMagic.com